Taking Control: What You Can Change
When it comes to relationships, it's important to remember that you can't change people. However, that doesn't mean you're powerless. In fact, there are plenty of things that you can change in order to take control of your relationships and ensure that they are healthy, fulfilling, and positive. Here are some key areas where you can take control and make a difference:
Choose What You Focus On: Your attention is a valuable resource, and what you choose to focus on can have a big impact on your relationships. Instead of dwelling on negative aspects or perceived flaws, choose to focus on the positive and appreciate the good qualities in others.
Change Your Expectations Often: we have unrealistic or unfair expectations of others that can lead to disappointment and frustration. Consider adjusting your expectations to be more reasonable and accepting of others as they are, rather than trying to mold them into something they're not.
Change Your Perspective Sometimes: simply changing your perspective can make a big difference in how you view a situation or relationship. Try to look at things from a different angle or consider the other person's point of view to gain a deeper understanding.
Control Your Actions and How You Engage: While you can't control others, you can control your own behavior and how you engage with them. Choose to communicate respectfully, listen actively, and be open-minded.
Express Your Needs, Thoughts, and Emotions: Being honest and direct about your needs, thoughts, and emotions is essential for building strong, healthy relationships. Be clear about what you want and need from others, and don't be afraid to speak up when something isn't working for you.
Practice Acceptance & Letting Go Sometimes: the best thing you can do for a relationship is to accept things as they are and let go of the need to control or change the other person. This can be challenging, but it can also bring a sense of peace and freedom.
Set or Change Boundaries: Healthy boundaries are essential for maintaining positive relationships. Take the time to consider what your boundaries are and communicate them clearly to others.
Influence How You Spend Your Time: Your time is precious, so make sure you're spending it in ways that bring you joy and fulfillment. Consider who you're spending your time with and how you're spending it, and make adjustments as necessary.
Accept That It Is Not Your Job to Fix/Change Them It's not your responsibility to fix or change others. Recognize that everyone is on their own journey and has their own path to follow.
Give Yourself Closure Sometimes, relationships come to an end. In these cases, it's important to give yourself closure and move on in a healthy way. This may involve forgiveness, letting go of resentment, or simply acknowledging that it's time to move on.
Choose How You Think About and Treat Yourself Your relationship with yourself is just as important as your relationships with others. Make sure you're treating yourself with kindness, compassion, and respect.
Give Yourself Compassion and Love Be gentle with yourself and practice self-compassion. Remember that you're doing the best you can, and that it's okay to make mistakes.
Validate and Respect Yourself Finally, make sure you're validating and respecting yourself. You deserve to be treated with kindness and consideration, and it's important to stand up for yourself and assert your needs and boundaries.
Remember, while you can't change others, you do have control over many aspects of your relationships. By focusing on what you can change, you can build healthy, fulfilling relationships that bring joy and meaning to your life.